Ex wife is a problem, daughter just l!ike her?

bf has been divorced for little over 3yrs.(married 18 unhappily on and off) . there is a 21 yr old daughter. she had moved out before div final. we met 8mo after div and have been together since. well the ex would call up just about everyday. i asked him to please tell her it isn't necessary for her to keep calling you. he said he told her when they got div he'd be her friend. she was taking advantage of this when were together. they have nothing to talk about the kid is 21 so it's not like they have young children. the daughter had a shower at his house, he went and took down our pictures because he didn't want to upset the ex and daughter. i was pissed. so when she calls now i get angry i left one night when she called. the next day she calls telling me they had phone . when i told him he needed to call her back and tell her to stop this he said that it wasn't not true. she brought up old times and he reminded her why they where div. he said he told her things to pacifier her. he aid he doesn't want to get back with her or be with her. he thinks that helps. any way she called and i blew up. i told her just what he said to me that he didn't want to be with her that he just pacified her etc..... nothing that he hasn't told me right ? she calls the daughter( like she always does and puts her in the middle) she calls her dad and tells him he needs to tell me to grow up and i should keep my mouth shout. now i have put up with this for 2/12 yrs never said a word until then. the daughter is a case just like the mother but i bit my tongue. so do i blew up nicely to the daughter now? I've had enough.